Thursday, August 23, 2007

My Own Plans

So this is just a little thing really, but I thought I'd share. I had one of those aha moments yesterday, in a very ordinary, every-day-life kind of way. I was thinking about some of the stuff that I've taken on in the past 3 months or so (some of which I subsequently dropped), and trying to figure out why some of it has worked and some of it hasn't.

Back in March, I was invited to be a part of the digital creative team for a designer named Genevieve. At the time, I was not on any creative teams, and had no commitments whatsoever. I had just committed my scrapbook budget as my tithe (since I have no job, and therefore no income), and I really felt like God had given me this opportunity out of His faithfulness. Right from the start, this position has been nothing but good. It's been fun, easy, no-stress, and just a joy all around.

Well, shortly after this, I had been offered a spot on a creative team for a scrapbook web site. It was one of those things where you get a gut check, and know you shouldn't, but you want to, so you do it anyway. Yeah - that's called being disobedient. That's exactly what I did. Then, about a month later, loving all of the free stuff I was getting with my first 2 team positions, I agreed to be a member of yet another team. So let me just say that neither one was enjoyable, both were struggles, and sources of stress. Suddenly, it was like I was not enjoying my hobby, and I was trying to force it to work. No fun.

Well, after trying and struggling for quite some time, and after God dealing with me on more than one occasion about these last 2 commitments, I finally decided to step away from them - put them down and walk away. Aaaaaaaaah. That's better! Instantly, no more stress, no more struggling, no more trying so hard and enjoying so little. And because I laid them down, I was able to agree to a long-term position on Genevieve's team.

Well, I realized yesterday what should have been plain and simple, and really quite obvious. The first one worked because it was from God. The second two did not because they were my own schemes. On the surface they look very much the same - creative team positions, similar requirements, free digital products, etc. But the source of the opportunity makes all the difference in the world. This is a Biblical principal, and, as I've recently been reminded / shown, it applies to big and small aspects of life.

Even Jesus said 'I do nothing of My own will, but the will of He Who sent Me.' Nothing. So if that's true for Jesus, it surely should be true for me. And I'm reminded of Abraham - perhaps my favorite man in the entire Bible (other than Jesus, of course). Abraham and his wife wanted a son so badly. Well, they ended up with 2. The first, Ishmael, was conceived of their own bright ideas, their own workings and schemes. The second, Isaac, was given by God, in God's way and in God's timing. One was a struggle, one was a blessing. While my own situation is far less significant than Abraham's, the same principal applies.

Father, please keep me from pursuing my plans and instead guide me through Your plans.

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These are just my thoughts on things related to my daily walk with God. I've always been a journal-keeper, and this is the area that demands most of the space in every journal I've ever kept. This is my passion, and I hope that by sharing my thoughts on the things I'm going through, I might be able to bless you in some way. Enjoy.